missed communication

I've not really learned how to talk to people. Although maybe it's more reasonable to say that I don't know how to carry proper conversations, because I can read body language, facial expressions, silences, and other non verbal cues and usually manage to go from there. My problem has to do with what to say to people to keep a volley of conversation going without confusing them. Because my brain has a tendency to jump to numerous directions, obsess over words or phrases, or gloss over words which make it seem like I am not paying attention or just cause me to respond with a weird comeback.

I go back and forth topics, talk too fast, giggle, and sometimes wonder about things out loud and confuse other people. I confuse other people and possibly offend some at times although that is never my intention. I say things that may seem unrelated to what we're speaking about but they are if you fast forwarded the conversation and arrived to that particular avenue, like word games and correlations and how everything is related to one another. Like how if I say star I could mean a plasma energy seen in space, a drawn picture depicting a star, a celebrity, or how it sounds like a cross between the words 'stare' and 'tar'.

Words are fascinating and putting them in a string to form phrases and sentences and letters and books and conversations are amazing. But words are also confusing and sometimes halfway a conversation you don't even realize that what you say or unable to explain properly upsets the person you're conversing with. I dislike upsetting people. I dislike being unable to give proper life to the ideas in my head, to be able to say what I mean with clarity. I dislike having two different conversations where I am oblivious to the resulting catastrophe until afterwards.

Double edged swords. Now if only I can muster the courage to say I'm sorry like a proper person and hope that they can accept. All I can say is it's harder to read non verbal cues via text messaging. I just need to speak more clearly and think of what I say before I blurt them out. Sounds easy enough right?